Well, that was a much needed break. I opened my laptop only a handful of times and posted nothing to Instagram for nearly a month. I didn’t delete the app on my phone but probably should have. (I’m still trying to get out of the habit of mindless scrolling or story-watching things I could care less about.) I know I should probably be telling you to like, comment and buy more, but if you need the least bit of encouragement, I would highly recommend taking your own break for a week–or even a day. Guess what? Nobody thinks about you or what you’re doing as much as you do. ;)
Everything is just so calculated these days. Everything–and I do mean everything— is an event to be glamorized. Cookie making, coffee drinking, working out, eating dinner, building a snowman, nail painting, cleaning out a drawer, buying new shoes, taking your kid to the library, feeding your kid a snack, holding them when they’re sick. . . It makes me weary to watch other people living sometimes. It’s not that these aren’t good things but sometimes, they’re just moments meant to be lived and not staged or documented. And, I openly admit I’m guilty of instantly captioning a moment in my head as it’s happening instead of enjoying it. Why? Why do we do this? I kind of hate that this is how my brain has become conditioned when it’s amazingly good to look up at real life all around you.
It’s also tough to teach our kids these things when we’re guilty of it ourselves. Man, this is a tough time to be a mom. And for that matter, a tough time to be a teenager. For all of the good that technology brings, I would gladly throw all of our phones out the window for a chance to raise my kids like it’s 1984 again. I would love to give them the pleasure of not knowing what everybody else is doing 24/7. (Before I get a ton of comments, we do have technology rules and it’s pretty easy to for a Clark kid to get their phone taken away, but still, the pressure is there. I can feel it and I know they do, too.) As far as my younger kids go, I can’t tell you the number of times they’ve looked over my shoulder and asked “whose baby is that?” or “who’s that kid?” Sadly, my response should be something like “I have absolutely NO IDEA. Just some stranger whose pictures I’m looking at instead of looking at you.” Yikes.
Then there’s the other side of the coin where I feel compelled to post a pretty picture almost every day–since that’s what I do. To be honest with you, I feel like I’ve outgrown the rat race of self promotion that’s required when you’re a full-time blogger or influencer (I hate that word, by the way). But, blogging without a social media push isn’t really an option anymore, and I get it. Everybody’s phones are attached to their hands so if you’re going to be seen. . . I guess my plan is to do my own thing with blinders on as much as possible, post what I have and ignore everything else if I can. I know I sound like an old lady complaining about the good old days, but I do miss the general enthusiasm for painting a lamp or changing up a gallery wall and sharing it via some grainy photos in a blog post with the no professional lighting and no posing in an outfit that color coordinates with your room.
On a more positive note, Spring is here, everything is blooming, and I am feeling refreshed after taking some time off.
How is social media treating you these days? Do you take regular breaks?
I too have been taking a step back from social media (not completely, but purposefully spending much less time on it) and your thoughts ring so true for me. Being so aware of the daily lives of people I haven’t actually talked to in years (or maybe have never even met!) has taken up far too much of my attention and emotions, leaving me with less to give the people I love most. If you go back to just doing a blog with no social media promotion, I’ll still gladly read it! ❤️
Well said! I miss 1984 times too! Thank you for your honest blog. And I know your kids are great -just look at their MOM!
Amen, and amen, and amen again.
Yes, yes, and YES!! It’s hard to step away from it completely, but I’ve definitely reduced all forms of social media. NO Instagram, NO Twitter, facebook about once/month. I talk to REAL people who are all around me in the real world.
And a beautiful spring is a great reminder that we get new beginnings. It’s been many years since my daffodils were this beautiful!
Yes to everything. I said to my sister recently, I miss the old days where painting a coffee/end table was a huge deal and everyone who saw it (in person) thought it was the best thing since applesauce. Now, thats childs play. Most things on Instagram make me feel like I’m not enough. Not clean enough, bright enough, pretty enough, organized enough, new enough, busy enough, shopping enough…. it’s exhausting. I always love your perspective, Emily. You’re spot on with this. 😊
But you R enough!
If that’s how you, a grown woman, feels how does a typical 13 or 14 year old girl feel? That’s what is scary about social media. The adults can say, “okay, I’ve had enough’. Do the kids beat themselves up because they think they are less than the staged influencer they’re watching?
Man, am I glad I’ve never gotten into Instagram or any social media really. I already feel so many of those things just from seeing other people’s homes. I can’t imagine if it was in my face every day. And to CHOOSE to spend precious time that way, it’s just never made sense to me. I guess because I just didn’t get on the FB the bandwagon for some reason and then all I seem to hear people who do it say is how they are needing to get away from it.
Emily, I wonder how many of your readers are like me. I love to read blogs but do no other social media. I bet your blog would do just fine and maybe even be more of what you wanted.
Yep yep yep. Do it Emily! Same feelings over here and I don’t have the same pressure as you in your work! And *how* I identify with what you wrote about parenting—sheesh!
Xo
This was so refreshing to read this morning. I agree wholeheartedly.
I love what you do. I love what you share. I will continue to in whatever capacity you feel is right for you!
I do agree with everything you said. I miss the days of just visiting a blog when I had some time to relax. Now it’s in my hand via IG and tbh lessens the enjoyment maybe because it’s mindless scrolling. Some of my favorite bloggers in the past have switched to (what seems like) only Amazon hauls… It IS hard to be a mom these days and harder I can imagine as a teen. I do love your blog consistently true to you. ❤️
There are pros and cons that come with technology… I have 4 kids ~ 29, 26, 15, 12. I am CONSTANTLY telling/asking my husband, “Weren’t things easier with the older kids? A simpler time?”. I love ALL my kids just the same, but I throughly enjoyed the times with the older ones. Technology is a struggle in our home when all I want is a ‘REAL’ connection with the 2 left at home. I can completely relate to what you are saying. Pros and cons….
This!!!! I took a hiatus and January and post at leisure. I don’t check in often, which is why it’s not a successful platform for me. I appreciate that it brings others joy and occasionally it does for me as well, but it feels contrived.
This is your platform. You own it, you make the rules. This is your business. You don’t have to utilize social media because your talent and kindness have created an audience who is inspired by you.
Amen. I really just want to follow my brother and sister and a handful of people I feel this odd kinship with even though we’ve never met. To be honest, I only follow all the others out of fear, not love.
Thank you. Instagram has become just one more shopping platform
Too many try ons. I liked it better when content was occasional and it was more real
Always enjoyed your Saturday posts
Thanks
Well said, so agree with your words of wisdom. I raised my kids in early 90s with little phone use and survived. I do feel sorry for mommas today. The pressures are very real. Have taken breaks and it’s crazy how much happier we all are. Took a spring break trip and took no pictures. 😂Happy Spring
Oh man, yes! I am so grateful I didn’t grow up in this tech age, but it’s hard to know how to parent children in all of this, since no one has done it before. No one knows the best way to do it, so we all just do what we feel is best for our situation. That being said, I take the first 7 days of every month, and each Sunday, off of social media. It is such a good ‘reset’ for my brain and my habits. It’s a really great way to check myself and make sure that I am spending more time in the moment, instead of thinking how I could capture and share it.
Simpler times, less doing without intention and ‘heart,’ more peace and presence. Certainly, this all can be done with effort and commitment. What I ask myself: what kind of online ‘community’ do I seek and what kind of online community feeds what most matters in my life? What I’ve discovered in visiting decor blogs over the last ten years is that the decor bloggers are finding they have and want their lives back! For full-time decor bloggers who depend on the income their blogs generate, it’s pretty daunting I would imagine. How to turn off brain that keeps collecting ideas for the next post? Esp with that computer right there in their homes. As a reader of just a few decor blogs, I miss the days when bloggers focused more on just improving the home decor without posts on fashion, lifestyle, etc. Clean, simple–take a room and show what ‘could’ be done; take a representative question from a reader and answer it (for all with examples); take a concept (like what’s a trend/what’s a classic) and give readers the blogger’s take, etc. To save my life, I would do one post/week. Period. Every Wednesday or whatever. That would free up my life for living intentionally and with joy.
This is why I have loved you since the days of grainy photos!!! Agree 1000% with every word!
Yes to everything you said. ❤️ Thanks for putting words to what I’m thinking and reassuring me that I’m not the only one. 😘
I agree with everything you have said here. I am an empty nester so I don’t have the issue of technology competing with real life with my children but I can see it all around me. That being said, you are a huge inspiration to me (love, love your home) and a great example of a good balance of social media. I did miss you during your break but I will look forward to whatever you want to share. Thanks for being a great example in this crazy techno world of not letting it take over every aspect of your life!
thank you for this. I just re-joined social media yesterday after a 6month plus break because I was struggling with a lot of the same issues. I have 2 tween daughters (not on social media yet, but it is coming in the next few years), and as much as I would like to stick my head in the sand, I do feel like I need to do everything I can NOW to model a healthy relationship with social media for them.
I keep searching for some sort of book/course/manual to help us as parents navigate through these choppy waters! I think its great to be mindful and present as much as possible and it sounds like you are a really fantastic mama to your kiddos. Keep up the great work. Blogs are still my favorite thing! I can’t keep up with IG. It makes me exhausted.
https://axis.org/ Has been helpful for us!
thank you for this. I just re-joined social media yesterday after a 6month plus break because I was struggling with a lot of the same issues. I have 2 tween daughters (not on social media yet, but it is coming in the next few years), and as much as I would like to stick my head in the sand, I do feel like I need to do everything I can NOW to model a healthy relationship with social media for them.
I keep searching for some sort of book/course/manual to help us as parents navigate through these choppy waters! I think its great to be mindful and present as much as possible and it sounds like you are a really fantastic mama to your kiddos. Keep up the great work. Blogs are still my favorite thing! I can’t keep up with IG. It makes me exhausted.
This really resonated with me! I don’t use SM professionally in any way and while I rarely post things I am constantly looking at it. Currently working on not checking whenever I’m bored or just scrolling mindlessly through it in the evenings and weekends.
I follow mostly home decor bloggers but I feel like I know so much about their families and private life. My husband and I don’t have kids but something we have talked about is how much (if any) to share about our future kids on SM. My personal feeling is I don’t want to share much, if anything, because I don’t think any of us have a full understanding of what the future will look like and how babies today will feel about a their life being full documented- likely without their consent or understanding- when they become teens. How would I feel if all the embarrassing photos or silly stories shared within the family were available for everyone (bullies, crushes, etc.) to access during my middle school years? Likely I would not have liked it.
You are the only blog I have continued to follow for years. And this is the reason why. Thank you for staying true to yourself and being an inspiration.
Thank you for being so real! Makes me appreciate what you do write and post even more!
I identify and agree with every bit of this post. Thank you for sharing.
YES! Social is a love / hate relationship, isn’t it? I do enjoy staying in touch with friends and family via social. I do like seeing design ideas or new recipes or even learning about places to travel. I do feel that social has gotten too staged and many people jump on the same ban wagon when a certain design idea starts to emerge. As much as social needs to be authentic I question, “if people really know how to be authentic any longer. ” I agree, let’s take it back to the 80’s and 90’s when you made memories together and captured them in your head or on 35mm film you had to get doubles of to share with others.
I’m tired of seeing the outstretched arm with a coffee mug in hand with the sweater wrapped around the fingers. I’m tired of seeing a picture of a blogger with a phone in their face. What’s going on there? I’m tired of seeing feet on a rug. I’ve been reading home décor blogs for probably close to 10 years now. The only ones that I truly read now and not scroll through are the ones that got me hooked long ago. Yours being one of them. Thanks for keeping it real.
My husband and I don’t do social media. Our teenagers (three boys) have Instagram and Snapchat. They rarely post or check it, maybe because we homeschool and they don’t have the traditional peer pressures. I don’t question it, but I’m thankful they don’t really care much about that. And, honestly, I’ve quit following all the blogs which have sponsored post after sponsored post. I am trying to live a simpler life and not fill it with more stuff. That’s why I like your blog so much. It’s authentic. It’s deriving joy from moving things you love around to create a fresh space. It’s not about constantly buying the “latest and greatest” new thing. Keep doing what you do and believe me, there are plenty of us who will keep following along! We want creativity and not commercialism.
PS Really dislike the “influencer” moniker as well!
Agreed! My only social media activity is reading blogs, and I definitely do that to excess. Working on it. I do so love making a house a home, and budget ideas for doing so. I guess it’s my only creative outlet. I do not want or need perfectly staged everything. In fact, I find it irritating. The bloggers I read, yours included, seem very real life to me. Keep doing what you do best!
I feel so out of it sometimes but I’m not on social media…tried a couple of sites years ago but it’s clearly not my thing and I deleted the accounts. Oh well.
Emily,
I am quite over all of this! Contemplating returning to a flip phone just for emergencies. I happily browse your content when you post and require no more than what you are happy to post. Let’s resolve to take back our lives and live with the humans in front of our faces; not those who seem to have their poop in a group waaaayyyy more than we do. 1984!
Missed you…welcome back!
I am not a blogger, but I am a blog reader, and I feel the same. I intentionally don’t do instagram or Pinterest (I know a scary rabbit hole when I see one! LOL), and limit my FB time. I read blogs on the internet (not a reader or anything). I miss the simplicity of what it was, and get irked by the tags in blog posts, “if you want to see X, click over to my instagram!” I do want to see X–please put it in this blog post about X!
I’ve never been anti bloggers making money from what they do, but don’t like where the profitability craze has taken the whole thing. So commercialized, rather than just reading about my friend painting a lamp…
I have appreciated your thoughtful blog posts on this topic, and love what you do. Thank you.
I get more and more annoyed with social media, and Instagram in particular lately. A former blogger I follow, who now has a podcast, recently spoke about becoming a minimalist and paring down her wardrobe, and yet daily there is a new shoe, jacket, pair of pants, etc. that she is modeling and telling us to swipe up. Ugh eye roll. I’ve also thought a lot about the presence of smart phones and social media, and how it has affected my parenting. I got my first smart phone the year my first baby was born. To think of how may hours I have spent looking at Pinterest instead of my two babies’ faces makes me sad. Maybe on some days it saved my sanity. I know on other days it added to the exhaustion and distraction that I feel so often lately. I’m getting a bit weary of it, and there are days I too wish to chuck my phone out the window!
I couldn’t agree with you more! I am amazed at the countless hours throughout the day that I am most likely guilty of mindless scrolling. My husband and I always talk about how we are so happy we grew up without social media due to the pressures and comparisons they constantly have to deal with…yet I do the same thing as an adult. A new season to start more mindful behavior!
I took a social media break for a little over a week. It was amazing. I did not have the urge to shop. My biggest pet peeve right now with Instagram is how everyone is pushing sales and products. I get it. Got to make a living, but it’s wearing me down. I’m quicker to move on and put the phone down now.
I agree with all of this. Its like you downloaded my thoughts exactly. Hahaha… 😊 esp the feeling of outgrowing the rat race of self promotion. So wise, Emily!
I love your honesty! You put in writing all that I feel about Instagram. Spending my days thinking about “should I post this?” and then questioning why I did was just too much. We weren’t made to think in such a way!! And I admit to experiencing those moments when a child questions whose photos I’m looking at. Yikes! Wake up call! Social media is indeed self promotion – you hit the nail on the head. Blessings to you and your family!
I quit my blog several years ago, just shut it down, because I didn’t like the way I was starting to feel. Too much pressure to be pinterest or instagram worthy. I felt like I was doing things for all the wrong reasons and putting pressure on myself and my kids to be something we aren’t – perfect. Sometimes I regret it when I see other bloggers who started when I did attain certain successes but overall, it was the right thing for me.
THANK YOU!!!! You have encouraged me to the do the same and be PRESENT. Enjoy the Spring :)
I am with you on the social media. This goes for both adults and teens. I feel it’s why the suicide rate has been so high as well as pressure on these kids.
Fifth grade girls are also nastier than they were a few years ago.
I am the odd one out:) I don’t do twitter or Instagram, but I enjoy Facebook. But, I don’t have kids to monitor and that makes a difference. I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and I have made many friends across the country with the same disease that I communicate with and someday hope to meet. I can find out if someone is going through a difficult time and pray for them and offer encouragement through their Facebook page. I like keeping up with friends that I worked with before I retired and family members that live close and far away. I enjoy seeing the pics of everyone’s kids and their travels. I have friends that are home bound and they enjoy seeing my travel adventures, so I post for them. I also get ideas for new places to visit as well as first-hand restaurant reviews. All that being said, I do not stay on social media 24/7. It doesn’t take that long to check in when I am down for the night. Plus, I enjoy writing so my page is a creative outlet for me. Sure, some friends ‘overshare’ but so be it. Each person has to decide what and how much to share. I don’t take a break, but I do check out every now and then – until I get curious and want to know what everyone is doing:)
Glad to see you back, and I completely agree on all of the above. I even chuckled at your description of “outgrowing” a lot of the social media pressure, as that is exactly how it feels to me, too. And a big yes to bringing back grainy photoed blog posts of small changes in homes….when I’m watching insta stories of bloggers, I spend most of my time checking out their home in the background to see what might be new or different. My enthusiasm for the everyday is definitely still there!! Keep being you, Emily!
I agree with you 100%. Recently, a young mom on Instagram told followers she was going to take a social media break and pay more attention to her children. The very next day, she was already back on with a video and you could hear her child saying “Mommy” while pulling on her sweater as she rattled on and on about something she bought at Target.
Bravo Emily. I couldn’t agree more with your sentiments and am so glad you shared this with the world. I too am trying to hold out and just live life without too much planned sharing. It’s hard not to get caught up in the comparison game so I’m just going to focus on doing me and finding joy in that. Phone down and glass of Pinot in hand.
Excellent post! I whole heartedly agree! Thank you for your honesty. I dumped Facebook over a year ago, and don’t have any other social media accounts. I’ve often thought that I just want to live in the moment and not document it for all the world to see. I also have a 14-year-old who has always been unwilling to post for photos, so we have lots of things that are just “posted” in our memories. Bless you.
Well said, Miss Emily. I noticed your absence and missed your posts. Social media is a way we connect these days. But I appreciate when that connection is genuine and you seem to do that well. Glad you’re back?😊
Yes! Yes! YES!!!!! ALL of this. I get so sad when I go places and I see everyone on their phones, especially our youth. I was out at a restaurant the other day and everyone at the table was ignoring each other and had their faces buried in their phones. What has become of us? Just recently got back from a Spring Break roadtrip and made a last minute decision not to post any pics of it. I’m not sure why…maybe I decided that I just wanted to keep those memories to ourselves?
Anyway…you are smack on, Emily!
Hallelujah!
So true, Emily! This has been said before, but I think you said it the best.
I’m not a blogger–just a blog reader. Your blog is my number one favorite. Take as many breaks as you need.
So true! I follow a select few blogs and never go to their IG page….too much! Have to laugh as this all feels like it did back in the scrap booking heyday…”ohhh I have stickers for ice cream cones!..” – (when the outing gets eclipsed by how the page will look🥴)
I’ve been thinking the same thing Kate!
I’ve decided to use social media in a way that adds a positive impact on my life. I’m a 70 year old widow, so I’m retired and live alone. Yes, I have local friends and family, but I also have friends and family all over the world. Social media, especially Facebook, gives me an easy way to know what’s going on in the lives of those I can’t easily see on a regular basis. I think it’s like getting Christmas letters every day! Plus it allows me to share a little bit of my life with others. Social media keeps me from feeling isolated!
I just love your comments. Thank heavens you are a woman with good common sense. Actually, good sense is not all that common anymore. Also, you are a truth teller. Thank you for that. It is so uplifting to read comments such as yours. You speak for many of us.
Amen, could not agree more! But I do enjoy starting my Saturday morning with your Saturday Sixes, so please keep those, even if you take another social media break. 😉
I am so glad I’m not the only one feeling that way! I am so over all the self promotion blogs. There was a time I was signing up for any blog that looked interesting, but when they turn out to be nothing more than pictures of the blogger, her kids, her husband, or her dog EVERY SINGLE DAY – I’m done! Thanks you for being real!
I never got into face book and recently deleted Instagram and I’m so glad I did. My main reason was because I didn’t want my daughters on it or thinking “can’t wait to get older and get on Instagram” cuz their mother is on it often. I felt that it set up u reasonable expectations of life and could easily create jealousy and unhappiness… haven’t regretted it for a minute.
Beautifully said! I wish more people felt like you. One of the reasons I choose your blog to come back to when I do choose to be on social media is that you truly seem authentic in what you say and do which I greatly appreciate.
Emily,
So well said….I totally agree with you!
I’m with you! I haven’t been on social media much lately, but I did miss your Saturday six. I was a bit worried and I’m glad to hear you’ve just been taking time for real life.
Couldn’t agree more! I’m a mom of 4 & years ago I decided I was tired of seeing their birthdays & school concerts behind the lense of a camera. So I have fewer pictures & videos of my younger ones, but I got to be present in the moment & that was more important to me
Emily, you’re fantastic and I love everything you said here. And by the way, I appreciate your WRITING skills – I love to read your posts and stories about your decor and life and family. Reading – actually reading! – makes one think (!) and reflect (!) Scrolling thru curated (ugh hate that word) photo after lifestyle scene (ugh) by influencers (ugh) has become endlessly depressing. (Sorry for the sarcasm.) I only read your blog, and will probably never follow you on any other platform. Mostly because none of them seem rooted in connection and to me that’s what this is all about. Anyway, enjoy the spring – your home looks beautiful with the blooms- we still have snow on the ground!
Oh goodness yes. So much that gets posted out there just seems so “empty” and there’s such a loss of authenticity. Even the “real life here” posts seem fake to me!!
I decided to take a fast from social media every Sunday and try not to go on FB or IG. I’ve surprisingly really enjoyed that!
A thousand times YES to ALL of that.
Couldn’t agree more with everything you’ve said. I’m working on this myself as I realize the time I waste on social media – and I haven’t even gotten sucked into Instagram at this point! I was just thinking the other day how my viewpoint makes me sound like an old lady, but I see the effect it has on me and my kids, and I don’t like what I see. :(
This is THE most real post I’ve ever read about social media! So many of the things that you shared are my exact sentiments. I have been blogging for 10 years, very simply documenting the start of my marriage and the milestones of our now 3 kids as they’ve grown. I miss the days when bloggers really felt like pen pals and things were so simple. It always makes me wonder, what in the world will be next?
I gave up instagram nearly two years ago when I found myself scrolling on my phone more than enjoying the precious moments of my maternity leave with our last little one. It was definitely a big shift when I first deleted it off of my phone but I really haven’t ever looked back. Now, I am always just blown away when we have our weekly family dinners with extended family on Sunday nights and everyone around me is glued to their devices. My own two year old was saying good-bye to my Dad tonight, and said “Bye Grampie, Bye Siri!” because even grandparents engage their littlest grandies in playing with their phones.
It saddens me and makes me wonder if we’re all missing out on the life right before our very eyes because we’re so busy staring mindlessly at the lives of others. Boundaries are a must and I am trying so hard to push back against the current norms and channel my inner “1984” as we raise our little ones.
I took a 3 day break while my daughter was home over Spring Break and it was so refreshing.
I try to unplug on Sundays as well.
I fully agree with and support you!
WELL SAID.
I DID raise my two sons through the eighties and nineties and indeed, it was a different world. And yes, that is an accurate description; things are totally different now. I have heavy child care responsibilities for my grandchildren (all under the age of six) and having a phone with me allows me to videotape many activities so we can share with their parents. In this way I hope their Moms and Dads will feel like they are part of the fun. But it is so frustrating to see other parents scanning their phones at the park, restaurant, etc., when real, authentic life is happening, and being ignored, right before their eyes.
I also agree that we need to put the brakes on elevating and recording Every. Single. Damn. Thing. that happens in our lives. My husband (of 40 years) and I got engaged when we bought a bed together and realized that whoops, it wasn’t a proper thing for an unmarried couple to do. Now an engagement is no longer a private moment, but a carefully orchestrated event sometimes involving a cast of hundreds and an equal number of photos and videos. Usually on top of the Eiffel Tower. But that’s not the worst part……this can also be said of an invitation to the Prom! Does a young girl really need the pilot of a commercial airline to read (over the intercom) a letter from her boyfriend, issuing the invitation? Fortunately, that never happened…… safety regulations forbade it, Thank God. But seriously — enough, everyone.
I know what I sound like because my children are always telling me…….and I do understand the positive uses of modern technology. But I wish we could dial it way back and reclaim some of the calmer and less complicated events in our lives. Everyone is feeling so stressed these days, and despite what SEEMS obvious, social media — designed to connect us all — often leaves us lonely and despairing. I say that especially regarding young people, who scarcely know life any other way. I would be thrilled if everyone felt the way you and your readers who (responded so positively) do, but with a new and better phone being released almost monthly — I have very little hope for an improved situation. Still, this wonderful column is a good start. Let’s put our devices down and cross our fingers. Peace, everyone.
Recently deleted the Facebook app off my phone and have a feeling Instagram is about to go too!! My kids are 7 and 4 and I figured I need to walk the talk of not being in my phone too much. Also, I realized I couldn’t complain about not having enough time to get things done when I’m wasting precious time scrolling through FB. My daughter has also asked “Who’s baby is that?” and I was dumbfounded to respond “Have no idea.” Enough!! I also see that 7 year olds have Instagram accounts and it makes me sick to my stomach.
Pulling the plug big time and it feels great and don’t really miss it at all.
Please! Paint a lamp! Redo a gallery wall! I’d love to see small-scale DIY projects again; not everything needs to be aspirational.
I’m so glad that someone else feels like I do! I’m going to be 69 next month & have 2 grown married daughters & 2 grandsons; 10 & 9 years old. I have a cell phone, but do NOT feel the necessity to constantly be texting, checking my email, scrolling through FB, etc. Even my daughters feel like there is more to life than FB. I went to NYC last weekend to see a show & couldn’t believe how many people (my age, not even younger ones) had to be asked to turn their phones off during the show. Having a cell phone is great & it gives me great comfort to know that I can reach my children whenever I need or want to. However, I do not CARE that someone woke up with a headache this morning, had a flat tire on the way to work, etc., etc. It’s too bad if something like that happens to you, but not everyone needs to know about it. I know that I’m venting & I’m sorry, but so few people feel as I do. Hope that everyone has a nice day.
This post is exactly why I will continue to read your blog as I cut out several others that are just “too much”. Too much cutesy conversation, too much of the staged, perfectly lit photography, etc. I appreciate your “low key approach” to motherhood, home life, decorating and fashion. Thanks for keepin’ it real girl!
I took FB off my phone a while ago. But I love IG and occasionally use SnapChat. I can go days with barely checking in on social but then end up going in for a while (usually at night before bed) when I do. I post pictures of my kids and some other things here and there. I post for me though. I post so I can remember extra special things and include some of the things I don’t want to forget in the caption. I don’t post for anyone else. [Although I do occasionally post pics on FB for the grandparents who are not on IG.]
I remember when I was little if I got to go to the park my mom wasn’t watching me the whole time. She’d be talking with a friend or walking around the park. When it comes to SM, just like other things, everything is okay in moderation. I think it’s easy to berate yourself for being on it too much and it can turn in to another thing to feel guilty about. #momguilt
I will say I am tired of everyone looking the same, posing the same, etc. I love your blog because you do you and are tre original!
yes yes yes! last week when instagram was down and everyone was panicking i was like YES!!! a break! it’s draining, deflating, and one can’t help but start to feel inadequate. i so often have nostalgia and wish that i was raising my kids in the 70s or 80s. while i love being connected to people all over the world, i would be happier if i was just more deeply connected to those within the walls of our home.
Yes, I totally agree with your post. It is interesting that I happen to be reading Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport right now and he says some of the same things! I hope we will begin to see a downward trend to the overuse of social media.
Yes, I totally agree with your post. It is interesting that I am reading Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport right now and he is saying some of the same things! Hopefully, we will begin to see a downward trend to the overuse of social media. Thank you for being real.
I totally agree with your post! It is interesting that I am reading Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport right now and he is saying some of the same things. Hopefully, we will begin to see a downward trend to the overuse of social media.
Emily, you took the thoughts right out of my head and it just once again reminds me why I’ve read your blog for so many years! About 7 months ago I decided to majorly step back from Instagram so now I very rarely post and stopped doing stories and the funny thing is that my mom, who lives in a different state, told me that other people were asking her if I was okay or if we were having a hard time because I wasn’t doing my usual stories of kids at the park, cooking, doing fun things, etc….and it really confirmed my thoughts that I was always posting just to post some happy perfect version of life instead of just Living it. Authenticity is a myth on Instagram. There is too much info. Too much “real” life. I know way too much about too many people that I will never ever meet. That is super weird, right?! I still scroll probably once a day and I do have a page for my Etsy shop that I do a very mediocre job of posting on (because I hate it but feel that it’s necessary?), but I’m trying to be more intentional because there is SOME good in there with all the bad. I also have been posting my family photos and sweet stories on a good old blogspot blog that I don’t promote and is mostly only read by my grandmas and aunts and I LOVE it.
I am SOOOOO thankful I was out of college and married before Instagram became a thing. And that I didn’t get a smart phone until I was 24! I cannot imagine being a teenager with one and am terrified of the teen years for my kids for this very reason. Bring back the 90’s, bring back the land lines “hi mr. Carter, is Katy there?” 😂, and bring back those glorious disposable cameras!
You took the words right out of my mouth;) Thank you for your honesty and for saying what so many others are afraid to say…
Yes.Yes! A thousand times YES!
I only read your blog as I sort of can’t stand that most of the bloggers I follow now only tell me things via Instagram. For that I am making a not very big statement but not following them on social. I realize it may not mean much as I am only one person, but if you posted only on your blog and the photos weren’t high quality, I would still read it! I love bloggers being more authentic about their social media usage and then following through with getting back to non-professional photos in completely unstaged settings. So much more relatable to me and my life. Thanks for this post! I’ve followed for a long time but never commented before as I just consume and don’t engage and I’m trying to change that habit myself!
All the Best!
Emily,
YOU ROCK!!! Maybe because I graduated from HS in 1984, but I loved this post. I don’t blog, I don’t get on facebook anymore and occasionally look at instagram, but yet I totally get what you’re saying. Btw, I don’t care for the word “influencer” either!!! :) I could have so totally been your cool babysitter!! :)
Amen! Preach it sister! 😂 this is why your blog is one of my favorites. You have such a level headed, reasonable perspective. I am thankful for you! Keep being you, and your faithful readers will be here with you. ❤️
I’m 36 and I’ve never really done anything with social media😬I initially didn’t because I was a young high school teacher when Facebook was becoming popular…now with young kids I sometimes wonder if I’m missing out? I want to just enjoy the moments and not feel like I need to show what I’m doing to be valued. But people who post frequently do have this element of being “known.” I don’t really feel known by people outside my family and close friends and it makes me feel like I might be missing out. Other times I kind of like that and feel like I only want God to be my audience in the small moments of my day. I guess there’s always a tug back and forth with it …I love your blog and will continue to be a loyal reader. Thanks Emily!
I have deleted my Instagram so I have no clue if you are posting but I still love reading your blog! Social media is hard enough to navigate as an adult, my heart aches for teenagers right now. I have a three and five year old and am trying to be more conscious of my phone usage because I know they are watching and learning my ways. Now if I could only get my husband to stop with the work email!
Thank you! I slowly weening myself off of social media and blogs that are overly concerned with selling me things. It’s very interesting to see how companies use blogs and other social media to get to a targeted audience. I understand everyone has to make money, but it’s all just too much.
As a mom to young children, I’ve also felt the guilt of looking at someone else’s Instagram post with my kids looking over my shoulder asking who it is that I’m looking at or liking instead of doing something with them. Time to wake up.
Looks like you hit the mark with this post. :-) Social media has turned into one big way to promote and sell. It is such a waste of time watching others show what they are buying or doing with their lives every single day. I stopped spending my precious time on social media last year when I realized I was missing out living my own life. I’d rather live in my moments with the people that matter to me and are physically present in my life. These are the people and moments that matter in life.
I have never been a big social media blogger and it has not hurt my blog at all. In fact my readers tell me they prefer blogs that still share projects with the grainy photos like you mentioned. You have such great style and I have always enjoyed your blog. Reading this post makes me like you and your blog even more.
I’m antonishwd that social media has grown so much. I thought everyone would try it, burn out, and move on. I do worry about my children (12,10) being so “ON” all the time- and having access to friends and happenings in a second of time. I try to control it- but it just seems to the way of life. I do think it will fade away, and the pendulum will swing towards seeking privacy. Maybe we should all ban together and seek 1984 and push for free thinking and evolving in a natural way. Wishful thinking….
What a refreshing post from an almost 67 year old soon to be first time grandmother. You have my admiration and full support for your convictions and the courage to state them. I imagine there are many others who align with your viewpoint but aren’t as willing to say so. I hope your comments resonate with many of your followers and that many follow your lead. May God bless you for your choice in speaking the truth of social media & it’s daily effects on each of us. Keep up the good work & the lovely posts. I love your style❣️
Thank you for being so honest! I have been a fan of your blog for years and like them much better for design ideas. I do find myself being engulfed by FB and Instagram and have to put my phone down but for my 20 year old its somewhat harder. I remind her that she needs to put it down and life is what happens around her and her friends in life will be her family neighbors church family and maybe a few coworkers if that. I have always loved your eclectic style and painted my bathroom Urban Bronze like in your past home. Everyone who uses it loves it still today:)
Just found this and have to say BINGO! You hit it perfectly. I’ve been feeling… and doing exactly the same thing. I began with not looking at Facebook for two weeks and found I really didn’t miss it. Now I check in maybe once a month, if that. Then I unplugged from IG one day a week, now it’s the entire weekend, and some days it’s a CHORE to post a pic. Death to my blog I know, which has also been seriously neglected. Oh well, I write it for me anyway. Loved this post enough to become a subscriber, I found you through Thistlewood. :)
I so agree. My situation is different, in that my children are grown and I now have grandkids, but as a photographer I feel compelled to make everyone beautiful (and they ask me to…can you take off 10lbs, get rid of my wrinkles…). I do enjoy making my clients feel they look their best in their photos, but to relax I take bird and nature photos, or do some street shooting where editing is minimal. The pressure to be more, have more and do more is crushing.