Lately, I’ve had several readers ask me how I decorate our home while having small kids. Aren’t I afraid they’ll break things? How do I keep them from touching things at their eye level? From pulling lamps off of tables? From eating candles? From marking on white furniture? From getting handprints on glass tables? You get the point.
Truth is, all of these things have happened in our house. And, I don’t think there’s one magical answer on how to decorate your home when your kids are little. Instead, I think it’s more about a mindset than an actual decorating style.
Now, please don’t envision me as some go-with-the-flow, always happy, anything-goes mommy. I’m not. Was I irate when I found half a tube of Chap-Stick rubbed all over our new sectional? Um, yes. Did I freak out when I found Sharpie on our new bathroom walls in our last house? Also a yes. Do princess stickers stuck on our hardwood floors make my heart race? Why, yes they do. Do toys and socks everywhere all the time make me feel like a crazy woman? Occasionally (although I’m trying to be better about that).
So, how do I create a home that makes me happy to look at but is still livable for my kids all at the same time?
Ultimately, I buy things I love, keeping in mind that they are just things. If I’d be too devastated if it were to get broken, it’s probably not what I need in this season of my life. And, that’s really just what it is. A season of life that will pass by (quickly, they tell me), and then, I can decorate my house with crystal tsotchkes from floor to ceiling if I want (or, at least until the grandkids come over).
So, while a certain accessory or set-up might not work for us right now, in another year from now, it might. I’m not a long-term decorator at this point in my life. While I want a pretty home, I sometimes choose value over quality. For example, I wouldn’t be quite as flustered to see someone swinging like Tarzan from my $30 IKEA curtains as I would be if I had spent hundreds of dollars in fabric for nicer, custom ones that look similar. And, I won’t feel half as bad when I’m tired of those same, spaghetti-stained curtains and decide to replace them in several years.
That was the same thought behind our sofa purchase. I found it, almost brand new on Craigslist for $150. Was it exactly what I had envisioned? Maybe not. But, it’s easier to take five monkeys jumping on your couch (which they’re technically not suppose to do) knowing we’re getting our money’s worth out of it.
And, we do have a few house rules, although even those aren’t totally rigid. I try my best to enforce no eating/drinking outside of the kitchen. It’s a treat, then, when they get to eat popcorn on the couch while they watch a movie. And, I tell them not to jump on furniture, but still catch them diving from the couch to the chair and ottoman on the other side of the room. I’m also not a fan of markers and pens in their bedrooms—and yet, I could go pick up a handful right now. I don’t want our house to get destroyed, but I really don’t want my kids to grow up feeling nervous in their own home.
With all of that said, I don’t think you should give your house over to the kids. It’s ultimately your house and should feel like grown-ups live there but with enough breathing space that kids can be kids in the same rooms. What that means to me might be different than what that means for you.
I do know that pretty rooms can still be affordable and comfortable, without looking like you live at a preschool. Storage is key. A big, pretty basket or a storage chest with lots of drawers can be your best friend. And, as I’m learning with each new day—and each new baby—so can learning to let go of some of the things that don’t really matter.
What’s your philosophy on decorating when you have small kids?
My baby just started her first year of college but I still could offer a couple tips. We never wear shoes inside the house so the furniture and rugs stay cleaner. A slip covered white sofa was the best investment we ever made, no explanation necessary. The kids were responsible for messes their friends made-it may be harsh but we made my son pay half the cost of having our basement carpet cleaned when he was too embarrassed to tell his friend that he couldn’t have sofa in the basement, red soda that ultimately got spilled on the rug. (He never made that mistake again!)
I think you’ve nailed it: relax is the key word.
I like having nice things around but buying something that is not( somewhat easily) replaceable is not worth it for me at this point of time.
We still try to teach our kids to be cautious and careful but kids will be kids and what fun is a bed or a sofa in nobody jumps on it ever?
In this stage of life (with a 9-year-old and 5-year-old), I am not buying expensive furniture but that does not mean that we are existing on particle board from Wal Mart. I think that you can still have a beautiful home with furniture from HomeGoods and World Market! If I had to do it over again, I would have bought a dark couch. Light beige (even with the stain protector treatment and the replacement plan) was not my smartest idea.
I find it hard to put cute holiday decorations on my side and sofa tables as my almost 1 year old grabs things constantly! Other than that and lots of toy storage, not too much has changed.
I love this, you have a great perspective. Very good advice, thank you.
Tammy @ thecoloreddoor.blogspot.com
Great post! As my twins are starting to become mobile I’ve been wondering about this myself!
Hubby & I work to teach our kids to respect their home and the items within it. As soon as the kids became mobile, we explained to them the difference between a toy & a decoration. With a 7,4 & 1 1/2 year old in the house, we’ve yet to have any piece of furniture or decorative piece damaged…..our hardwood floors are another story though–lol.
Great post.
I totally agree! I never put anything away when my kids were little. I believed they could learn what was for them and what was to be left alone. If I could just get them to keep their things picked up now….we’d be doing great!
Agreed! Well said!
I love this post! You are so right about relaxing. They are only little for such a short time and the things around the house are just things! I have a great quote on my Pinterest board that says – “If you’ve never jumped from one couch to the other to avoid the lava, you’ve never had a childhood.” That pretty much sums it up! Have a great day! – Shelley
I feel exactly the same way about decorating with kids. A lot of my decorating decisions were made with them in mind-wood tile floors instead of wood floors, a slipcovered sofa from Ikea, etc. But, I also like these things and don’t buy them strictly because I have kids. Thankfully, they are getting less destructive as they are getting older, but we still have “accidents” once in a while. Now, if I could just get the puppy on board!
You hit the nail on the head, friend! I have had lots of questions about “where are all the toys” and “don’t your kids break things?” I completely agree with everything you said. My kids are really only allowed to have water outside the kitchen, excluding our basement, and we have boundaries. I think setting these rules at home helps my kids when they go elsewhere. If they know not to put their shoes on the couch at home, they probably won’t embarrass me by doing it at someone else’s house. Notice I said probably. :)
Ah.. this is the perfect post. And the best post – ever! I get so annoyed when I see pictures of people with kids and have all this breakable stuff – and I think that either this is unrealistic, or they dont let their kids be kids. I am currently in the process of doing our master bedroom, because that is a kid free zone, and the rest of the house, is kid friendly. We even blocked off a playroom for our twins. (Not that they stay there yet – at 18 months, but I know they will soon). I want a home, not a house!
I love this! Such a good and refreshing perspective.
I dont think i’ve ever commented but i am a frequent reader of your blog. I have never yelled yes in agreement with you so much than your post today. I have three little ones (2,4 & 6) and i can completely relate to this. I always say we are not in “the season of life for a truly organized and clean home”. It helps giving yourself a little bit of grace. I do sometimes get so fustrated with putting things off. Like you say these are just things and you have to live in the moment sometimes to be happy. Great post!
Very well said, Emily! Our house rules are almost exactly the same! You can have both a fun, child friendly home and a stylish home that works with the adults, too! :)
As a child, I was always thrilled when my mom decorated for holidays. So I try to focus on that with my kids (9, 7, 6, 3, 1, pregnant). When Christmas is over, I focus on my house until Spring – where do I need to improve, upgrade, renovate, etc. When summer starts, I do nothing to decorate – we maintain until fall. I find that I could be decorating all the time if I let myself!
I love this advice! We have tried giving the kids some space in each room (either a basket of books and cars or an kitchen drawer, or the living room ottoman). My kids never want to play in the playroom if I’m not there. They seem to feel as if I should always been within eyesight (which is funny bc we have a fairly small house). Giving then a stash of toys in each room has truly helped (my stuff doesn’t becomes “toys” then). And all my furniture seems to have sharpie on it – ironically one spot is from my 93 year old grandmother ;).
This post made me dig into your blog until I came across the post announcing your pregnancy with your twins. I laughed out loud when I saw the picture of your face because I think that’s exactly what I looked like the day I found out I was pregnant with twins, when I had a 5 month old at home. Except for maybe a few more tears. Talk about being face with the reality of God’s total sovereignty. Thanks for the inspiration to keep a beautiful home that is still comfortable and adjusts to the craziness of young kids.
Emily, what a breath of fresh air it was to read this! I’m working on a post about how toys have taken over our living room (we don’t have another play space) and although my husband essentially tells me the same thing regularly, hearing it from you (a decorator I respect, with kids galore) makes a real difference to me. It will change how I write that post and see our living space, which I think of as my secret decor/organization blogger shame. Thank you so much for your honesty!
Relax is good, but I also use the word no and back it up. : – )
Thanks, Emily! Loved this post. We’re only three years into marriage, and I’m still working on achieving a beautifully decorated home WHILE my two-year old is learning how to explore EVERYTHING. Like you said, baskets and pretty boxes are my solution to all the toys, crayons, and baby shoes. Thankfully, my little girl seems to love piling all her toys into baskets. :)
So true, Emily. We have rules, and they get enforced. Except when they don’t, and that’s okay too. ; ) I know I join many, many others when I say I love seeing the beautiful staged photos, but I adore the real ones. Bravo!
Great perspective, Emily. And this time will go by quickly! Before you know it they’re grown.. I remember i used to leave my coffee table empty so my toddler son could stand there and play with his toys – that’s just what I did to make both our lives easier. It seems like yesterday, but he’s a junior in college now!
Wow, this is pretty much my philosophy, but so well put! I should (and will!) let my husband read this, since he’s of the old-school, super strict mindset. I have a bunch of musical globes on our bookshelves which my toddler loves, so I just keep the least valuable ones on the lower shelves and put the precious ones up top, and then supervise him winding them up, so it’s extra special treat/quality time, and so on.
Thank you for posting this!
Relax is right BUT still make the home your own! My daughter’s things NEVER took over our house. She has her room and playroom. That is it! lol I still bought expensive items.l I never skimped on my style because I had a child. My style has never suffered!
What happens when your husband won’t adhere to the “No Drinking/Eating” outside of the kitchen rule. My husband has stained more furniture than our kids. And I can’t expect for them to follow the rules when my own husband refuses to. Seriously frustrating.
Completely agree with everything you’ve written. Great post.
Aww, the babies are already so big. You re so right about the no eating outside the kitchen. That alone, will keep everything so much nicer. Before you know it, they will be bigger and you will miss the mess. I know that sounds crazy, but I miss some of it.
I agree! RELAX. Also, be thoughtful when decorating or buying furniture. Every family is different. we are an “on the floor” family….we move our furniture around to accommodate board games, block building, blanket forts, picnics etc. I have cheap store bought curtains but a more expensive quality leather sofa for durability. I bought our coffee table from craigslist for the sole reason that it was sturdy and would be destroyed if someone were to jump from it to the sofa (also not condoned but stuff happens),
Like you said, I want it to look grown up but still a fun, relaxed place where I can love on my family and no one is so on edge that they don’t feel comfortable or welcomed.
Another slightly embarrassing fact….since I discovered Good Luck Charlie on the Disney Channel, I have been DVRing it just to get design inspiration!
**wouldn’t** be destroyed!
I operate on a very similar philosophy, and it’s the only way for me to maintain sanity with little ones running around. We have an IKEA sectional and sofa – probably not my first choice, but from a value perspective with little kids, we know that we don’t want to be worried about feet on the couch, spilled drinks, etc. We furnish our home to live in it – and it gets messy, but it cleans up nicely, too.
As someone who not only has a house that has breakable things and white furniture but also grew up in a house full of antiques and breakables, I couldn’t agree more. Things will get broken from time to time, it is just the way it goes. Like you, I just keep anything extra special to me, out of site until we pass the ‘oops I broke it’ stage. Of course, I remember breaking a huge old antique blue and white platter of my mom’s in high school. So I guess that phase never ends. :)
Love your philosophy. Win some, lose some but enjoy the journey along the way. We try to do the same.
I love love love seeing your kids in their space! We are the same here- And often the coffee table is covered with cars and trucks, and that’s just fine. We have already started transitioning to most extended play happening in their playroom, and I know its just a matter of time before they won’t want to be in ‘our’ space. Enjoying this time more and more as I relax into this amazing babyhood.
(also, as they destroy the carpet I get closer and closer to my wood floors…)
Sarah
My philosophy is exactly the same as yours! No jumping on the furniture (why do people allow their sofas to be treated like trampolines?) and no eating outside of the kitchen (except popcorn on movie nights) Other than that, they should have FUN.
Your kids are super cute too!! :)
I truly loved the post! It was inspiring and comforting – both at the same time! Love your blog!
My philosophy is exactly like yours! I don’t want to stress over things that are bound to happen with kids at home…well said. :-)
~Sarah
Love it and feel exactly the same way. Toys creeping into the living room & dining room from the playroom drive me a bit crazy but that is life with a 7 and 4 year old. I’m thinking of upgrading our living room couch which I got on CL for $100 – trying to decide between the affordable Ikea sectional or the comfier Boston Interiors sectional….
I remember well the “ugly house period” when my children were toddlers. Children grow up and that’s when one can reclaim the house.
Your right about RELAXING! But what I’ve tried to do all the time, is to make the kids ‘make their mess’ then I make sure I clean up before I sleep, so the next morning when I wake up, I would not get a headache from the mess!
I LOVE this post! Thank you for writing it. As a new mom, this is a concept I feel I have sort of struggled with. Your home is such an inspiration. I really do feel like you let your kids be kids but you don’t skimp on the style one bit.
Great post! Can I ask you where you got those gorgeous skirted ottomans flanking the piano?!
I love your ideas behind decorating with kids, and I think you said it better than I ever could. And yes, they are really just things. Keep the perspective. Besides, even though my oldest is only 3, they’ll be out of the house too soon and I’ll miss all the evidence of them playing and learning and exploring.
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My aunt collects antiques (actually a lot of my family does) and we grew up knowing that some things were off limits. Was my grandfather upset when my toddler age brother cracked his glass coffee table? Sure, but my brother was ok and that’s what matters. Things are things and sometimes they break. I remember my husband asking why I was buying glass items for our house before I gave birth but I knew it’d be ok. Teach kids limits, know things are going to break, and enjoy life while you can.
This is a great post. I do set limits, and we do have rules, but sometimes, things get broken. I think 4 kids in 6 years (as you can relate) will do that. It’s the sheer volume of little bodies and craziness. ;) We love our Craigslist couches for this season of our life.
I don’t sweat it! I have 2 large dogs that can be quite dirty so I roll with it! Looks like you do also:)
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Just yesterday I was going through some older pictures of our home while helping with my daughter’s sixth(!) grade timeline assignment. I remember being stressed out a lot of the time about the toys and clutter everywhere, but looking back on it now just makes me smile and miss it. It really is a season. I think you nailed this post, and I love reading your blog. You help me make my home prettier while still keeping it in perspective. So, thanks! :)